Dear Dr. Ding – How Do I Talk To My Nephew?

Image credit:

Image credit:

The following letter just came in earlier this week, from GirlsNightOut:

Dear Dr. Ding: Hola chica! I have a nephew who apparently talks to people but when asked he denies it and goes on with whatever he is doing. I told him in front of several family members that it used to be seen as being a weirdo but in all actuality it isn’t so you’re special in a very special way. He thinks I’m a lil on the weirdo side to begin with. I need help asking him about any and all the intuitive stuff. I can be very straight forward and I don’t want him shying away cuz he is a very shy young fellow. I know his lil brother saying that he heard him talking to someone made him shy away, but he too was like me – very close to my grandmother who was a curandera herself. Please help a sista out thank you. Love you!

Dear GNO:

Love you too, momma! Great question, and I’m so glad you wrote! And here’s my answer: just ask him. Seriously. The more straightforward you are, the better. Since there’s a common belief in many spiritual and psychic communities that the ability to naturally connect with the Unseen is often inherited, you can also reassure him that he comes by his gift honestly. And you can also tell him stories about your grandmother and anyone else in your family with intuitive gifts as a means of normalizing his experiences. Talking in a direct manner also makes it seem less “woo woo” and will help reduce his anxiety.

I’m assuming here that he’s pretty well-adjusted otherwise? Because talking to unseen others can definitely be a symptom of certain types of psychological issues, as you know. But it doesn’t sound like that’s the case here – usually with a mental health issue there will be things like odd behaviors, social and emotional withdrawal, and/or actual hallucinations, and it doesn’t sound like any of these are happening. He’s just talking to people who don’t have bodies, is all.

I sympathize with this fella; we live in a society that doesn’t approve of sacred healing traditions that fall outside the allopathic fundamentalist/medical model norms, and therefore when healers emerge as they’ve emerged for thousands of years, it can produce crisis. The thing that cheers me is that he’s got you; an adult who takes him seriously and who will encourage him to develop his gifts if he so chooses. You’re a safe person for him to talk to, even if he doesn’t feel much like talking right now! You’re offering him reassurance that he ain’t nuts, and also giving him a way to understand his experiences. Curanderos are in short supply these days, and the world sorely needs more of them.

I’m encouraging you both to check something out, as a kind of safety measure. My friend Crystal, has a truly bitchen psychic training program and has created a huge catalog of free videos available on YouTube. In particular, I’d like you both to check out this one on the issue of dominion, which is essentially a “how to” on psychic protection when dealing with disembodied entities/energies. She has a gift for taking these esoteric concepts and making them understandable without losing their beauty, and I think your nephew will feel a lot less like a “weirdo” after watching even just one!

Lastly, as far as those making fun of him – they’re totes jelly! Yup. Jelis bigtime. He’s just gotta brush that kind of dirt off his shoulder and keep stepping forward, secure in the knowledge that his abuela is watching over him, helping him learn and grow when he’s ready.

Love ya’ll!




Posted in Dear Dr. Ding | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Midweek Business

Sweetie darling, darling sweetie.

Sweetie darling, darling sweetie.

Dear Sexy People:

I am heading up to the mountains this weekend to hang out with a dear friend plus a new friend I will meet today. You can tell I’m a classic extrovert because since I’ve been out of prison, a stranger is just a friend I haven’t met yet. We are going to just relax and soak in the beauty. And by beauty I mean three bathtubs fulls of wine.

No but really, I may or not be posting a lot over the next few days. I’m going to follow my own goddamn advice and unplug a little bit. We will laugh, kvetch, shop, eat, drink, read, maybe play some boardgames, and just enjoy the scenery. I, for one, really enjoy a Classic Booty Jams dance party, so I may try to get that on. I also enjoy crossword puzzles, yelling at the TV, and Werther’s Originals, so shit’s gonna get real live most likely.

Sometimes when I’m relaxed I feel like writing and sometimes I don’t. In the meantime and in case you missed it, this is my YouTube channel. And you should probably subscribe because you don’t want to miss any of my off-the-cuff bullshit pearls of Dingish wisdom.

Also in the meantime, if you want to order a reading (see BOOK A CONSULTATION above), you sure can, but I won’t be able to get to you until Monday.

Last, I left clean laundry in the dryer, and if you could water the seedlings at night that would be awwwwesome.

Posted in Reflections | Leave a comment

Dear Dr. Ding: How can I better sense time frames?

This image is fairly close to how I envision timelines when asked to view them intuitively. I'm a Forever Nerd.

This image is fairly close to how I envision timelines when asked to view them intuitively. I’m a Forever Nerd.

Here’s my video response to the question a reader/viewer/enthusiast asked me yesterday on the Facebooks. In a nutshell, you have to detach from outcomes and already have some type of symbol-system in place that allows you to get specific intuitively-derived answers to your questions. Sound confusing? It’s actually not too bad.

Thanks for asking, gentle reader V.S.!

YouTube Preview Image
Posted in Dear Dr. Ding | Leave a comment

Send Me Your Questions!

This is an old working altar, with flowers from my Big Fella. Who I have yet to tell you about, but most assuredly will.

This is an old working altar, with flowers from my Big Fella. Who I have yet to tell you about, but most assuredly will.

Hello, gentle reader. Back in the old-timey days over here at Ask Dr. Ding, I used to ride a ridiculously oversized Victorian bicycle and sport voluminous Mary Todd Lincoln crinolines and receive actual questions from actual readers about all sorts of topics related to relationships, work, love, death, laudanum intoxication, you name it. And I miss it.

Somewhere along the line, I started blogging about a lot of other stuff, like my love of drag queens, Tater Tot casserole, and terrible movies.

But something is missing, and that something is you.

So. PLEASE write me questions to which I can respond either on here, or in my videos, for you see I stink at groveling, so you’re just going to have to humor me. See what I mean? I’m think I’m over here being all beseeching and whatnot, but I can’t quite get the right tone. But I’m so for real. Write meh. All authors are guaranteed anonymity, and if you don’t provide a groovy pseudonym I’ll invent one for you.

You can go up to the really sexy menu bar at the top, underneath the candle pic, and click Talk To Me, or you can just click on this, and it shall take you there on the wings of eagles or some shit like that.

Or, hit me up at askdrding (at)

Posted in Dear Dr. Ding, Glittery Glittery Drag Queens, Housekeeping, Reflections, Relationships, Sex | 1 Comment

ICMYI: How I See Spirit

My Frida Kahlo calavera. Don't freak, she's the shit.

My Frida Kahlo calavera. Don’t freak, she’s the shit.

It just occurred to me that some of you long-time readers (and god/dess bless you for staying!) may not know that I’ve got a YouTube channel over yonder. You can access my channel’s page here. You may wish to consider subscribing, or you may just wish to consider watching videos featuring all the exciting things you can do with refrigerated dough. And you know what? There are tons and tons of cool things you can do with refrigerated dough, turns out. So I really couldn’t blame you if you went over to my channel with the best of intentions only to find yourself hurriedly writing down all the ways you can make bubble pizza.

I’m including links to the latest couple videos I’ve made here and here.

In other news, it turns out that as far as video editing is concerned, my skillz suck donkey balls at 400psi. And I seem to grimace in a hoity-toity way in the stills. Working on it.

YouTube Preview Image YouTube Preview Image
Posted in Reflections | Leave a comment

5 Reasons You Should Avoid 5-Item Llists

Honestly? I just dig this movie.

Honestly? I just dig this movie.

I was numbly stumbling through Facebook today and saw the most unexpected thing: a friend of mine who I’d never thought would post anything, EVER, by a life coach or personal growth guru, posted one of those “listicicle” articles from a gal purporting to be cool and telling the rest of us we can be cool too, IF WE FOLLOW THE FIVE STEPS SHE’S LISTED BELOW. And sign up for her mailing list. And watch a free video that then leaves us hanging just prior to the Big Reveal. You know the dealio.

The five-item list has achieved permanent residency in the lives of even the snootiest academics, as evidenced by my friend’s post. Yes. You see, I’ve conducted a highly empirical and well-controlled study and that’s my conclusion.

I’ve written a lot of posts using this list format because nobody gets on a website looking to lose themselves in text. The list post is the lingua franca of the internet age, “here’s the info, don’t wanna waste your time by having anything go more than two paragraphs”, It’s the TL;DR, bottom-line version of everything.

It’s sad. We lose a lot of good information that way, information contained in nuance, subtlety, narrative. But I also grok that sometimes we’re in a hurry to digest main course information and don’t want to get all filled up on appetizers and cocktails first.

I’ll probably continue to use list posts because I find the format helps me focus my thoughts better. But they still make me feel a little wistful. And, of course, puckish.

For instance, why do there have to be exactly Eight Reasons To Leave Your Lover? Can’t the incessant bickering + lack of tolerance for each other’s quirks be enough? Or how about the fact that The Five Most Important Things You Need To Know About Midlife doesn’t seem to include such items as Try To Live A Little Before You Die With Your Music Still In You + Don’t Trust A Wet Fart?

Just mourning the loss of literacy, y’all. Don’t mind me.

Posted in Reflections | Leave a comment