Dr. Ding Goes To Boulder
That’s right, bitches. Dr. Ding is in Boulder, CO at an energy psychology conference. And I’m learning stuff completely unrelated to my more usual tropes of glitter, drag queen spirituality, sarcastic responses to reader mail and/or taking pot shots at Dr. Phil.
The stuff I’m learning here has more to do with subtle energy fields and the Holy Silver Go-Go Boots of GirlJesus™, plus all kinds of mystical psychotherapeutic shit that only a True Psychology Ninja can master. But only while wearing gauzy M.C. Hammer pants and listening to Yanni.
Jealous much?
Thought so.
I’ll be back when I’m damn good and ready.
| Etsy: QueenBodacious |
re: your “bitches”
Dingy,
Have I told you lately how honored I am to be in that number?
Is it odd that I like to walk around naked in my hotel room when I am out of town on business?
Feeling free,
nd-bitch-easle
I’m delighted that you’re rolling with us bitches, ndbeasle!
And no, it’s not odd that you walk around nekkid in your hotel room. I mean, isn’t that one of the great joys of subsidized travel? The opportunity to jangle one’s bits at random without fear of consequence, censure or commentary?
Since I’m from Houston, I thought a energy psychology conference was about psychology for those in the energy business ie oil and gas. I truly underestimated you.
ndbeasle, I know I’m not a psychologist but as a dog trainer, I feel that you are making that temporary place yours by leaving as much of your aroma as you can. That makes you an Ahpha Bitch. Keep up the good work.
Trainer:
Now that’s funny!
Also: I am very excited about the prospect of ndbeasle becoming Alpha Bee-yotch. I feel he would make an excellent pack leader and general Nude Troublemaker. Well, uh, I mean besides me.
OMFGJ, I don’t know what to say. I am not worthy.
Maybe I’ll get “Alpha Bitch” tattooed in script on the side of my neck.
(I did what I could to leave my stank. It is tough to drag your ass across the carpet having two arms instead of two more legs.)
nd-AB-easle
ndABeasle:
If you got “Alpha Bitch” tatted on your neck that would be hawt. And crazy. But still kinda hott.
Also — thanks to your room-scenting/territorial antics, I am very much trying to not look at the hotel carpet here in Boulder right now.
i hate to cherrypick your post (doesn’t that sound scabrous?…as in scabby and a little obscene?) because there’s so much good material there but i had my first dr. phil exposure the other day while i waited for the slothlike receptionista to clear the line and sometimes a bitch needs to vent.
i can now say without referenced footnotes that dr. phil is a suppurating, supercilious, scabrous sack of simian shit. he is as repulsively smarmy as david caruso and banally stupid as tom coburn.
goddamn, i feel so much better.
enjoy colorado, but don’t think you’re staying. your bitch legions disciples force will track you down.
that SHOULD read:
enjoy colorado, but don’t think you’re staying. your bitch
legions (crossed-out)
disciples (crossed-out)
force will track you down.
damn wordpress for not warning me which tags will tag and which won’t …
I don’t know. I kind of like “bitch legions disciples force”.
Kinda’ sounds like a 70′s Saturday morning cartoon. Or some kind of perv comic that I would have ridden my bike across town to buy.
I’m going to get a tattoo that says “Top Dinger”. My husband will get to choose where it goes.
Dr Ding, hope you’re enjoying all the naturey things of Boulder. I call crossing the median in the parking lot hiking, so that is about as naturey as I get. I know, blasphemy in a part of the country where most practice a diff sport all 4 seasons. My sport is discovering the town’s best latte. I think I’ve done a damn fine job of that. Hope to see you soon!!
ndbeastle: I LIKE “Bitch Legions Disciple Force” a lot. It has a certain ring to it.
Trainer: as always, you crack me up.
Gwen Bell: ZOMG I just realized I missed the shindig last night while I was up communing with nature. That said, I find it incredibly refreshing that you practice latte-drinking as a sport. This makes me happy.
Ding-Dong-Dash (away to Colorado),
Seeing as you had to replay to three of us in one post, I’d say the BLDF is doing just fine without you.
Stay in Boulder as long as you like.
She’s not here. She’s not coming back.
I wish I had some rocks to break a few of the windows.
Maybe some spray paint to do a graffito or two.
Take a deep breath, ndbeasle! She’ll come back and then she can work with your abandonment issues.